changing it up

I know I just said I was checking out for a bit, but you should never really listen to me. As you can see, I’ve given my blog somewhat of a makeover. Partially because I’m too annoyed with my writing to do a real post, but bored enough with the layout that I had to futz with something. But perhaps the bigger reason was to save the world!-one kilowatt at a time. Sounds ridiculous I know, but check out Blackle and you’ll see I’m not totally full of shit. It’s an energy saving search engine run by google, therefore it’s the same as google, so go set it as your homepage! Maybe it’s a tiny and seemingly meaningless difference, but I’m a firm believer in every little bit meaning something. I’m a weaver anyhow, and any good weaver knows that just one thread out of whack changes the entire piece. If you’re oober annoyed with my dark new blog, let me know and I suppose I could change it back. Then again, maybe I’ll keep it and ignore you.

I realized late yesterday that I’m way closer to Ireland than I thought! Two weeks to be exact. I am really excited for this trip, and in these crazy days of crisis, I can’t believe I have the opportunity to go. I’m honestly not as excited as I maybe should be for all the fancy stuff-my own seat in a car, daily showers, eating out, wearing shorter skirts and tank tops-I’m pretty much over all that. It will be great of course and I will enjoy it, I just mean I’m not bleeding every minute here for those things. I live and love the rural life. What I am excited about is ait uxaminu! (my family!) My dad, stepmom, Mia and Hanna. I haven’t seen them in ages and I’m terrified another two sisters will be taller than me. I’ve really missed out on their growing up and I always treasure the short times I do have with them. I also gotta take in all that I can from this trip because it’s only the 2^nd, but likely the last, trip I will take to Europe. Oh and beer. Real, good beer. Did I mention I’m hitting Belgium for two nights before Ireland? Chocolate and beer look out, I mean to consume you!

And, as has been the delightful case lately, I’m just as excited for my return. I have much going on now and am trying to make the most of the time I have left. One of my last nights with the above mentioned family we went to dinner with their friend who was an RPCV (and her beautiful kids-she actually married a man she met in PC). And one of the most important things she said to me was something a volunteer had told her before; that we have a choice to make early on in PC, a simple one, about priorities and time; between the people of the country in which we serve, and the easy comforts other Americans or big cities might provide. I wish I was as articulate as her, but what she said really stuck with me and I’ve thought about it a lot in my time here. I’m sorry I didn’t spend more of my service as committed as I am now, but I also acknowledge that I wasn’t quite the person who could at that point. Early on I sought Americans for fun, bonding and a break, and saw my relationships with Moroccans very differently. I also spent a lot of time in my mud hut and being shy. But now, mostly due to time, because it’s certainly not language, I feel so at home here and seek my community more than other volunteers or even the many great sights of Morocco I have yet to see. In fact, it looks like I won’t even use more than half my acquired vacation days by the end of my service because at this point, all I want to do is stay in town! But who knows, I may do an unexpected back-flip sometime.